Since inventing this ludicrous idea for a tournament several months ago, it’s become clear to the Nanny Coach that people are actually genuinely interested in this mythical event – or to put it another way, this site gets googled more by a miscellany of school names than any other search criteria, excepting for “Myleene Klass” (did I spell her name wrong or summat?) and “party 7 beer”.
With this in mind, I’ve extended the draw to a full 1024 schools, and plan to actually carry through with the competition, even if it takes 5 years to complete – which it will…
There’s nothing like a bit of healthy competition to get kids achieving their goals. And let’s face it, they’re more likely to get excited about putting one over on Blanchelande Girls’ College via some imaginary web competition than to improve their school’s DCSF “value added” nonsense statistics, or boost their parents’ house prices.
The results for each round will be based on whichever GCSE and A-Level -based statistic I choose at my whim, from the results that get published periodically in the media. Any non-existant schools, primary schools, and so on that have accidentally slipped in to the first round draw will quickly get knocked out.
Good luck all – the Nanny Coach’s decision on any result is final.
Complete draw for Round 1:
East Barnet School v Sutton High Sports College
The Compton School v Brixham Community College
Ladybridge High School v Bedford Field Middle School
Manning Comprehensive School v Noel Baker School
Eaton Bank School v Rivington High School
Our Lady’s RC High School v Wintringham School
William Crane School v Allerton Grange School
Cathedral Middle School v Glaisdale School
Farlingaye High School v Rainford High Technology College
Carr Manor High School v St Bede’s Catholic College
Queen Elizabeth’s Girls’ School v William Sharp School
The Brakenhale School v Werneth School
Newton-Le-Willows School v The Avenue Comprehensive School
Margaret Glen-Bott School v Burleigh Community College
Durrington High School v Sandhurst School
Leiston Middle School v Robert Sutton Catholic School
Cowley Language College v Yohden Hall School
Birley High School, Hulme v The Robert Smyth School
Marple Hall School v King Solomon High School, Ilford
Farnborough Sixth Form College v John Smeaton Community High School
Bramhall High School v Easthampstead Park School
Steyning Grammar School v Wansbeck Junior High School
Fairham Community College v Spurley Hey High School
Edensor Technology College v The Bolsover School
Canon Palmer Catholic School v Haywards Heath College
Blurton High School v Longhill Junior High School
West Bank High School v Top Valley School
Beverley High School v Richard Taunton College
Downlands Community School v Thomas Magnus Upper School
Tawd Vale High School v Ibstock Community College
Imberhorne School v Newark Magdalene High School
The Blackpool Sixth Form College v Elliott Durham School
Limehurst High School v Middlecroft School
Hessle High School v Sackville Community College
Westbourne High School v Lambwath Junior High School
Lutterworth High School v Lordswood Boys’ School
The Benjamin Gott High School v Ousedale School
Villa Junior High School v Henry Mellish Comprehensive School
Risedale Community College v Walderslade Joint Sixth Form
Trentham High School v Sandon High School
Kinloss Junior High School v East Bergholt High School
West Leeds Girls’ High School v Ryeish Green School
South Manchester High School v Birches Head High School
South Charnwood High School v Holbrook High School
Driffield School v Bury Church Of England High School
Thirsk School v Shena Simon College
Roundhill Community College v The River Leen School
Thistley Hough High School v Wortley High School
Dorchester Junior High School v St Gabriel’s RC High School
The Ockendon School v Pilgrim Upper School
Hastings High School v John Cleveland College
Woldgate College v Sir Wilfrid Martineau School
Edward Sheerien School v The Bulmershe School
Shipston High School v Sir Bernard Lovell School
Mitchell High School v Ivanhoe College
Wycliffe CofE Middle School v Brandreth Middle School
Maiden Erlegh School v Linmear Middle School
Counthill School v Perry Beeches School
Stratford-Upon-Avon High School v Kirkley Middle School
Highlands Junior High School v Silver Jubilee Middle School
Shrewsbury Sixth Form College v Ralph Thoresby High School
Highbury Grove School v Nodehill Middle School
The Ovenden High School v Alderman Smith School
Pope Pius X Catholic High School v Kingsway Middle School
The Hathershaw Technology College v The Manor School
Ysgol Uwchradd Glan Clwyd v Holloway School
St Richard’s Catholic College v The Calder High School
The Dales Junior High School v Hereward Community College
Luton Sixth Form College v Pindar School
Martin High School v Braim Wood Boys’ High School
The Snaith School v Ryde High School
Francis Askew Junior High School v St Edmund Campion School
Breeze Hill School v Bretton Woods Community School
Highbury Fields School v The Elmhirst School
Ysgol Dinas Bran v Stirchley County Middle School
Pimlico School v Buttershaw High School
Shepshed High School v Bushfield Community College
Kaskenmoor School v Morley High School
George Orwell School v Cudworth Middle School
Ysgol Brynhyfryd v Harborne Hill School
Todmorden High School v George Eliot Community School
Scalby School v St Cuthbert Mayne School
South Chadderton School v Ken Stimpson Community School
The Foulstone School v Somerton Middle School
Royton And Crompton School v The Halifax High School
Fitzalan School v Allertonshire School
Brickhill Middle School v Islington Arts And Media School
Lake Middle School v Grange Middle School
The Dolphin School v Bristol Cathedral School
Huntington School v Forest Grange School
Woodcroft School v St Andrew’s School
Wolfreton School v Heritage Community School
Abraham Guest High School v St Antony’s Preparatory School
The King Alfred School v Thomas Tallis School
Manor School v Elizabeth House School
St Cedd’s School v Princethorpe College
Evesham High School v Bales College
Philpots Manor School v St Edward’s School
Lee Manor High School v L’Ile Aux Enfants
Emmanuel Christian School v Carlton-Le-Willows School
Dylan Thomas Community School v Canon Lee School
21st Century Academy v Fulford School
Kingsmead School v Greenfields School
S and P Educational Services v The Davenport Centre
Raventhorpe Preparatory School v Sir George Monoux School
Holy Cross RC School v The Mosslands School
Shevington High School v Abbotsford School
Eaton House School v Charlwood House
Scott House School v Crescent School
Cocklebury Education Trust v Tower Lodge Preparatory School
Filton High School v Underhill Preparatory School
Silverwood School v Bishop Barrington School
Northwick Education v Sunfield School
Manor Park Community School v Great Walstead School
Wootton Bassett School v Francis Holland School
Archbishop Holgate’s School v Whinfield Study Trust
Heswall Preparatory School v Stapylton School
Rathbone Training Wigan v Firth House Preparatory School
Berkhampstead School v The Albany School
Baxhill Preparatory School v L’Ecole Des Benjamins
The Coleshill School v Wombwell High School
Oldridge Preparatory School v Whitford Hall School
Hartsdown Technology College v Thorns Community College
The Fold School v The Nobel School
Wolston High School v Featherstone High School
Stoney Lee Middle School v Abberley Hall School
Malmesbury School v King’s School Ely
Whinfell School v St David’s High School
St John’s School v Lochinvar School
The Magna Carta School v Sompting Abbotts School
Earlham High School v Witchford Village College
Stanborough School v Bearwood College
Bideford College v Baxter College
Haden Hill School v Market Rasen De Aston School
Westminster School v Emscote House School
Step Forward Educational Trust v Stockton House School
Carter Community School v Blanchelande Girls’ College
Lower Fields Middle School v Marlborough College
Hall School Wimbledon v Windsor Girls’ School
Thorne Grammar School v Theale Green Community School
Eaton Square School v The Northicote School
Second Chances v Pendeford High School
Patchway Community College v Warrax House School
The St Michael Steiner School v Brimsham Green School
Sakhalin International School v Kings Tamerton School
Marist Senior School v Al Farooq Private School
Maidenhead College For Girls v Abbey College
Sylvia Young Theatre School v Ardenhurst School
Hethersett Old Hall School v Redroofs Theatre School
The Kingsway School v Egerton-Rothesay School
Priors Court School v King Edward VI School
Thornlands Crisis Centre v Ward’s Bridge High School
Arnold Lodge Junior School v Newlands Girls’ School
South London Montessori School v Rose Bridge High School
Westminster Under School v Cardinal Newman RC School
Abercorn School v King Ecgbert School
Five Rivers Education v Allfreys School
The George Ward School v Avalon School
St Peter’s School v Woolston Community High School
Wessex College v Colne Valley High School
Heathcote School v Brooklands School
Burgess Hill School For Girls v Lansdowne College
Muslim Girls’ School v Waingel’s Copse College
Lavant House v Marlin Montessori School
St Leonards College v Dedworth Middle School
Hurstpierpoint College v Downton School
St Paul’s RC High School v Hyde Park School
Springfield Park School v All Saints RC School
Woodfield House School v Normanhurst School
Southways School v Hawarden High School
The Portsmouth Grammar School v Broadwood
Newton Preparatory School v Helvetia House School
Ratton School v Little Heath School
Morley Hall Preparatory School v Altwood CofE Secondary School
Bedford High School v Morpeth School
Stourbridge House School v St Michael’s Burton Park
Tabor High School v Micklefield School
Leicester Grammar School v Devizes Christian School
Abbeyfield School v St Joseph’s Academy
Smithills School v Peniel Academy
Oaklands Park School v Sturminster Newton High School
St Andrew Day School v Priestman Middle School
Penketh High School v Chelfham Mill School
Birkenhead Sixth Form College v Norlington School For Boys
The Ebor School v The American School In London
St Peter’s CofE Middle School v Park View School
The Brigidine School v Longacre School
Winbury School v Kingsley College
Belmont School v Gidlow Middle School
Leigh CofE High School v Ysgol Dyffryn Ogwen
The Prebendal School v Pershore High School
Coppice Performing Arts School v Bilton Grange School
Birkenhead School v Hartlebury School
Aran Hall School v Arden Lawn School
Motcombe Grange School v William Morris Academy
Baston School v The Godolphin School
Hawksworth Hall School v The Albany College
Hilbre High School v Bradfield College
Hindley Park High School v Brockhurst School
St Bede’s School v Ysgol-Y-Grango
Quintin Kynaston School v Aston Manor School
Hurlingham School v St Mary’s Preparatory School
Dolphin School v Bryngwyn Comprehensive School
The Clarendon School v The Grey Coat Hospital
Higham Lane School v Queen’s College
Northcote Lodge School v Clare Hall School
Sheiling School (Thornbury) v Hillcrest Slinfold
The Ark School v Midhurst Grammar School
Alvechurch CofE Middle School v Francis Holland School
Repton School v Ysgol Morgan Llwyd
Hookergate School v Sir Thomas Rich’s School
Brudenell Girls’ School v Charters School
Elton House School v The Byrchall High School
Prospect House School v Nevill Holt School
Montsaye Community College v The Franklin School
Tanbridge House School v Croydon High School
Walthamstow Montessori School v St Gabriel’s School
Lawrence Sheriff School v Crown House School
St Piran’s School v Conifers School
Our Lady’s Preparatory School v Noor Ul Islam Primary School
Sandroyd School v Warminster Kingdown
Oxley School v Wroxall Abbey School
The Piggott School v The Olive Tree School
Leasowes Community College v Padworth College
Iqra School v Brooke House College
Tom Hood School v Joseph Rowntree School
Hillcrest Grammar School v King Fahad Academy
The Hilden Oaks School v Alder Bridge School
St Aloysius RC College v Bredon School
Norfolk House School v Charters Ancaster College
The Dominie v Kingsway School
Hailsham Community College v Victory Day School
Cedar Park School v Pneu School Compton
Notre Dame RC School v Birmingham Muslim School
Davies Laing And Dick College v Chiltern Tutorial Unit
Real School v Carterton Community College
Colton Hills Community School v Eltham College
Treehouse School v Farlington School
Cardinal Wiseman School v St Mary’s School
Crawford Upper School v Calder House School
Aldworth Science College v Parliament Hill School
Westminster Abbey Choir School v Felpham Community College
Paradise Primary School v Prior Park Preparatory School
Shiremoor Middle School v Yago School
Priors Court School v Barbourne Preparatory School
Clifton Preparatory School v Devereux Preparatory School
Queen Anne School v Handsworth Wood Boys’ School
Warden Park School v Milverton House School
John Ferneley High School v Homefield School
Culcheth High School v Bishop Wulstan Catholic School
Great Sankey High School v Bootham School
St Francis School v Papplewick School
Holme Grange School v Ysgol Bryn Alyn
Lampton School v Hawkley Hall High School
Kingsbury Hill House School v Talmud Torah Yetev Lev
Mccaffrey’s School v St Joseph’s Catholic School
Smith’s Wood School v St Mary’s Convent School
Ruckleigh School v St Winefride’s Convent School
Chelmsford Hall School v Blackwood Comprehensive School
Valley Park Community School v The Charles Read High School
Park High School v Prenton High School For Girls
Windlesham House School v Warwick School
Wathen Grange School v Caldicot Comprehensive School
Jewish Senior Boys’ School v Southam College
Blackheath Preparatory School v Cedars School
Heathcote School v Claires Court Schools
Warwick Preparatory School v Dyson Perrins CofE High School
Avondale School v The Angmering School
The River School v Goldington Middle School
International Community School v Woodfield Middle School
Owlswick School v Edington And Shapwick School
Merrywood School v Tenbury High School
Eaton House The Manor School v Rainbow Retreat
South Hills School v The Knoll School
Littlewick Green Montessori v Woodhill School
Freman College v Perivale Study Centre
The Willink School v Hydesville Tower School
Sanderstead Junior School v London Academy
Northfields School v The New Beacon School
Rawlins Community College v Ladymede School
Stroud Girls’ High School v Hautlieu School
St Christopher’s School v Oaklands School
St Mary’s Catholic High School v Ardmore Montessori School
Battersea Technology College v Wetherby School
Royal Grammar School v Rhoda Reid School
Manor House School v Beaufort Community School
Winstanley College v Holgate School
King Charles I School v Broadwater Manor School
Bowbrook House School v Polesworth High School
Thomas’s Preparatory School v The Alice Ottley School
Trinity School v Rosemead School
Bellerbys College v Littlefield School
Ravenstone House v King James’s School
South Wirral High School v Parkwood High School
Windmill CofE Middle School v Forest School
Lennox Lewis College v Hazelwick School
Upton House School v Cotswold Community
Kimberley Comprehensive School v Great Ballard School
Kineton High School v Warminster School
Threshold Learning Centre v Aspull High School
Dolphin School v Northgate House School
Crawford Upper School v Tupton Hall School
St Joseph’s School v Saddleworth Preparatory School
Ardingly College v Ysgol Bryn Offa
Park Hill School v Cruckton Hall School
Hambling School v Donylands Lodge Education Unit
St George’s School v Chipping Sodbury Secondary
Downe House School v Walderslade Girls’ School
Ashford School v Broadland High School
Hexthorpe Middle School v Highfields School
Highfield School v Valley Park School
George Mitchell School v Headstart Montessori School
Carroll School v Furze Platt Senior School
Adt College v Highfield School And Nursery
Dolphin School v St Mary’s School
The Towers Convent School v Hagley Middle School
Sinclair House School v Slindon College
Woodstock Girls’ School v Aston Fields Middle School
Salesian College v Holmfield High School
The Sladen CofE Middle School v Walkwood CofE Middle School
Alsager School v Rushall Community College
Christ’s Hospital v St Joseph’s Dominican School
The Deanery CofE High School v Holly Lodge Girls’ College
Apple Orchard Education Unit v Invicta Grammar School
Arnold House School v Wolsdon Street School
George Salter High School v Kitebrook House
Overley Hall School v Thomas’s London Day Schools
Elstree School v The College High School
Hillside School Limited v St Laurence School
Luckley-Oakfield School v Clarendon School
Ash Manor School v The Vine Christian School
St Joseph Convent v Cox Green School
Montessori House v Lowfield School
Emmaus School v Royd Mount Middle School
Ernest Bevin College v Bognor Regis Community College
Rikkyo School-In-England v Manchester Salafi School
Elgar Technology College v Al Huda Girls’ School
Palatine High School v Gleniffer House
Wellington School v Dedisham School
Belmont School v Midhurst Intermediate School
Eton End Pneu School v Sunningdale School
Westbourne House School v Barlby High School
Heath Farm School v Tabangao School
Alpha Preparatory School v Bebington High Sports College
Priors School v Sybil Elgar School
Green Hill School v Douai School
Uplands School v Whitecroft Education Trust
Herries School v The Rydon Community College
Lion House School v Heathfield School
The Oratory Preparatory School v Standish Community High School
Prestwich Preparatory School v Highfield School Trust Limited
Swedish School Horsham v Salisbury Cathedral School
Woodhey High School v Rock Ferry High School
Goring Hall School v Ysgol Clywedog
Trescol Vean School v Bedgebury School
St Mary Redcliffe & Temple School v Homewood Independent School
Clayesmore School v Brookdale Education Centre
Parkland Middle School v Emmanuel School
St John Bosco RC Middle School v Riverside School
St Thomas More RC School v Duke Of Kent School
Elmhurst School For Dance v Golborne High School
Westminster City School v Sek International School
William Brookes School v Coach House School
Redcourt – St Anselm’s v The Emmbrook School
Wheatley Hills Middle School v Lubavitch House Senior School
Stonar School v Manor Middle School
Leaden Hall School v Pangbourne College
St Christina’s School v The Fledglings Kindergarten
The St Marylebone CofE School v Manchester Mesivta School
Heathland College v Burnholme Community College
Birkenhead High School v Ashfield Comprehensive School
Eton College v Eothen School
King’s Manor Community College v The Noam Primary School
Beis Rochel Girls’ School v Deansfield High School
Worthing Sixth Form College v The Hampshire School
Meadows v North Bromsgrove High School
Annie Lawson School v Crosfields School
Warwick School For Boys v Mesifta Talmudical College
Oriel High School v Mullion School
Bourne Community College v South Hills School
Clymping College v Lyndon School
Aldwickbury School v The Holt School
Spen Valley Sports College v Walsingham School
Kingsdown High School v Queen Ethelburga’s College
King George V School v The King’s School
Montessori Nursery v Emscote Lawn School
Islamiyah School v The Forest School
Bilton High School v Ipsley CofE Middle School
The Old School v Salisbury Avon Middle School
Manhood Community College v Balham Preparatory School
Collyers Sixth Form College v Manningham Middle School
St Bernards School v Wyvern College
Downshead School v William Morris School
St Mary’s School Ascot v Appleford School
Winton School v Westbourne School
Henley In Arden High School v White House Park School
Millais School v Killingworth Middle School
Osho Ko Hsuan School v Oathall Community College
Shaw House School v Arrowe Hall School
Netherton Hall School v Leyton Senior High School
Upper Avon School v Little Heath School
York College For Girls v The Minster School
Redland Green School v The Vale Rise School
West Kirby Grammar School v Queen’s College London
Middlewich High School v Trevelyan Middle School
Fairley House School v Hedingham School
King’s Hawford Lodge School v Sunny Bank School
Padgate Community High School v Howell’s Preparatory School
Pershore House School v St Christopher’s School
The Blue Coat School v Leaventhorpe Middle School
Ysgol Rhosnesni v Bredon Hill Middle School
St James’s School v Westergate Community School
The Bilston High School v Pensby High School For Girls
Forest Junior School v Fowey Community College
Malvern College v Bromsgrove School
Kersal Towers v St Paul’s Catholic College
Gorse Park School v Mesnes High School
Cambridge Steiner School v Downsend School – Epsom Lodge
Dorset House School v T P Riley Community School
The Henry Meoles School v High Storrs School
Herbert Shiner School v Godolphin Preparatory School
Newtown High School v The Mount School
Simon Balle School v Farrow House School
Abu Bakr Girls’ School v The Windsor Boys’ School
West Sussex Theatre Studios v To Be Decided
St Margaret’s School v Littlehaven Education Trust
Eaton And Wallis School v Heywood Preparatory School
Hurst Lodge School v Kirtlands School
Formby High School v Madresfield Early Years Centre
St Hilary’s School v St Helen’s College
Learning For Life v Kingsbury Comprehensive School
The Oldershaw School v Wolverley High School
Aveling Park School v Fairfield Preparatory School
Forest Preparatory School v Corpus Christi High School
Connaught School For Girls v Wolverhampton Grammar School
Middlefield School v Seaford College
Islamic Shaksiyah Foundation v St Margaret’s Senior School
Burley Middle School v Pocklington Montessori School
Chrysalis Learning Centre v Dunchurch-Winton Hall
Chafyn Grove School v The King’s School
St Hugh’s School v Ridgeway High School
Darland High School v Thames Christian College
Prenton Preparatory School v Ashdell Preparatory School
Portchester School v Worth School
The Acorns School v Rowan House
Brambletye Preparatory School v Chestnut Grove School
Duchy Manor Middle School v Whelley Middle School
Henry Tudor School v The Cathedral School
Wednesfield High School v Fulneck Boys’ School
Portland Place School v Grittleton House School
The Kingsley School v Dormie House School
The Manchester Grammar School v Waverley School
Roundstone Preparatory School v Worthing High School
Wycliffe College v The Leys High School
Lancing College v Ashton Park School
Chard School v Reading Blue Coat School
Nadder CofE Middle School v White House Preparatory School
Cransley School v Morfields Study Centre
St Wilfrid’s School v Grace Academy
Boundstone Community College v St Nicholas Preparatory School
Victory Day School v The Mount School
Ilford County High School v Sutherland High School
Aymestrey School v Stockbridge Village School
John Archer Boys’ School v Newbridge Preparatory School
Ashfold School v The Beaconsfield School
Phoenix School v Cardinal Heenan RC School
Cardiff High School v Henlow Vc Middle School
Edward Clements School v Malvern Girls’ College
Bridgewater High School v Ludgrove School
York Steiner School v Gillingham School
Ingfield Manor School v Moyles Court School
The Lloyd Williamson School v Vita Et Pax School
The Stonehenge School v New College
Honiton Community College v Forest School
The Drive School v Fullhurst Community College
Pennthorpe School v Ysgol Rhiwabon
The Mill School v The Urdang Academy
Fisherton Manor Middle School v Palfrey Girls School
Rugby School v Stimson House School
Springfield School v Hornsby House School
Cottesmore School v Bellerbys College London
St Crispin’s School v Kinloss School
St Mary’s Catholic College v Droitwich Spa High School
Brooke Weston Ctc v Bishop Fox’s Community School
The King Edward Vi School v Sedbergh School
Smestow School v Kingsley Preparatory School
Oakmeeds Community College v Moreton Community School
St Anne’s School v Thamesway Education
Bedford Modern School v The Hampshire School
Maypole House School v Holy Trinity School
Woodrush Community High School v Frederick Gent School
Sir Thomas Boteler High School v Fonthill Lodge School
Grange House School v Wilton CofE Middle School
Tumblewood Community School v The Terrace School
Mayfield Preparatory School v Telegraph Hill School
Lucy Locket Kindergarten v Barlborough Hall School
Shoreham College v Ifield Community College
Kingsway School v Dauntsey’s School
Stokesley School v Oakwood School
The Education Centre v Churchmead School
Parkdale School v St George RC School
Essendene Lodge School v Winterfold House School
Hardyes School v Feversham College
Kennet School v Wyke Manor School
Downsend School v Tudor Hall School
Soar Valley College v Portsmouth High School
St George’s School v Wallasey School
The Cherwell School v Whitley High School
Marymount School v The Toynbee School
Ashlawn School v Pdo Oman School
The Thomas Hardye School v La Retraite Swan
Ardmore School v The Groves High School
